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Desperate for Desperation - Calling all Villains and Victims


​Let's explore Identity lost, games, and slavery and why we give up all of our freedoms! You can't avoid desperations. We have all been there if we have lived independently whatsoever. I am not here to coach you with sunshine and rainbows. I am here to coach you on how to manage reality.



We've talked about curiosity. We've talked about questioning your thoughts. Let's talk about what is on the other side if we didn't question our thoughts. What are more than typical results. We should be curious, we should be rethinking our thoughts but then we fail, we fall into the valley, and we get stuck. What typically happens here is we look out for help. We look for someone to save us. Think get skinny with this pill, get rich quick, this guys is so dreamy kind of savoir. In those valley moments we naturally become a little desperate. It's totally expected as a result of our fall. If you have been through any type of failure, as I hope all of us have, then you know exactly how this feels. Today quick fixes are so readily available. It makes it even more difficult to see past the feel good excitement that we are being helped. Slavery is no new concept. It is a plague of mother nature for every form of life. The difference between a human and an animal is that an animal gets eaten with failed plans. In almost all of our cases as humans, we sell ourself that the lack of freedom is what we are worth or worse that it is just a normal part of life. If you don't know how amazing balance or fulfillment feels, then how on earth could you desire it. We even encourage ourselves to stay a slave out of comfort that our ideas are correct or that must be all we are worth. Slavery is when you cant express yourself without scrutiny. Slavery is when you can't do anything without some ones approval. Slavery is when you are stuck! You lose your identity, purpose, and usually passion.


I dug deep in my studies and reflection this week on slavery on even a more global scale how it continues. I see how we get into it but why do we stay in it? Well we're STUCK! Until a Moses, Abraham Lincoln, or Martin Luther King Jr. comes our way then we just stick with the same routine over and over again. I learned at a young age that anytime I ask for help there will be an even bigger price to pay. If you are susceptible then you are week and if you borrow money, energy, or time then your dignity will always be the price you pay. I don't hold to that as absolute fact anymore but I do believe that being prepared is a form of protection so that I am never making commitments from a place of desperation. Nothing has given me energy or been sustainable from decisions made on extreme emotional highs or lows. We become desperate...we become slaves. Why do we give this power away?


Now we easily go to villainize those that keep us "down" or take advantage of our desperation. Is it right that they are a predator of course not but you were in the same game as them. They wanted power or something for less. You wanted your void filled without doing any work yourself. Don't hate the player, hate the game? How about go do the work, read the rulebook, and make a strategy to be more prepared! It is the victims responsibility as much as it is the villains.


Try this thought, the person that follows a trendy fashion so that they can feel pretty compared to the person that follows the opposite of the trend because they want to feel like a cool powerful rebel. They are both slaves to a concept even though it doesn't look the same.


Slavery has no specific color when you go all way around the history books or look around to what slavery is carried out currently. If there is one color it shares, that would be green gold or silver. Money! It brings you power and with power. We are all a slave to the same concepts when you look within.


What do you need? What do you want? Are you looking within to build it or are you looking up for someone to save you?


I had a lot of fun talking with my bonus daughter exploring her array of new emotions that are being introduced as a 13YO. I was explaining to her that she should never trust herself when experience extreme happiness, sadness, anger, or scared. I quickly recalibrate to remind her to feel them and enjoy them but never make a commitment. A commitment as in don't make decisions that you have to pay for for a lifetime. You have to make decisions because life is so much more stressful when you are stuck but don't let anyone influence or pressure you until you have asked good questions and gathered evidence that supports the decision that works for you.

We all have the power to be aware. We do not have to be sold anything. We have the freedom to ask questions. When we dig ourself into a valley we all have the capability to get back to curiosity and dig ourselves out. If you dug yourself in then you can dig yourself out. It is always nice to receive a little help but make sure you aren't looking for others to dig more than you. The one's that seem like they will rarely do the job as well as you can.

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Find the funny, find your gratitude, love your dark side. We all deserve it!




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